July 26, 2009

I have to say that this time really kicked my butt! I've pretty much been sleeping since I got my chemo. I can't fight this fatigue. I've been nauseous too, but I've not taken many Zofran. I'm trying to see how bad it gets without meds. I don't feel like I need to run for a trashcan, but I don't feel great...kinda queezie I guess you could say. My taste is messed up again, but I haven't had the sore throat like I did the first few rounds. This expansion has hurt worse than normal too. When we were in the office to see Dr. Thornton he has told us (Chad and I) that if he were to take an X-ray of my chest before the expanders and now that you could see that my ribs were being bended into my chest. Hmmmm, well thats kinda what it feels like. Theres not much room left in there. I have to be honest, yesterday got to me a bit. It was the first time in a long time I felt sorry for myself. As I was getting into the shower I threw myself a 30 second pity party and then reminded myself that this is temporary! I wiped the tears and moved on with my day. I think not feeling well brings it out of us. I don't really think it was about feeling sorry for myself, but more that I didn't feel good, and I'm ready to get back to a cancer free life. Either way, I still have two more rounds to go, and I know that I am strong enough to make it, geezzz, I made it this far didn't I?